Physical Therapy a la Dante

Ok so- PT person from HELL. Yes, physical therapy- I'm not going to get into it in depth at this moment but today's appointment is aquatic therapy for a chronic pain condition in my back that has been fluffing my pillows and filling me with joy since 2001. Back to the physical therapist (PT)-

I swear I was told 9:15 and being the diligent person that I am and totally psycho about being early I came up from the hotel lobby 15 minutes early. (Interjection: to get to the pool I have to go through schmancy hotel and super-mc-fit-fit athletic club first. Not cool.) She comes out to get her 9:00 patient, sees me and says "You know you're not supposed to be here until 9:30 right?" I say: "Really? Oh. I thought it was 9:15." Curtly and with pursed lips- "No-ope... 9:thiiirty- we never do it on the quarter hour. Always half hours. 9. 9:30, 10, 10:30. 11."

Apparently by me - on what is only my second appointment and my first PT after the evaluation- by me coming early she assumes that I am only of nominal intelligence and do not understand where the half hours fall on the 24 hour clock. Thank god I have her to elucidate!

I say again: "Oh- okay- I guess I just thought they said come 15 minutes early."

"No-oo-ope." Grrr. "Not unless it is for an evaluation or you need to get changed." I know she is eyeing my swimsuit under my button down shirt. "Okay- no problem," I say. "I'm fine here- happy to wait and read for a while."

"Gree-ea-eeeat. Better get the name of whoever you spoke to so they can be corrected and this doesn't happen again. (long dramatic pause.........) Right." And off she goes. I am sure her 9:00 patient loved the show and time suckage. Makes me feel super awesome about hopping into the pool with her and letting her bust my ass for 30 minutes.

As a comparison my "dry land" physical therapist (different issue) and I talk about her moving in with her boyfriend and how great a holistic approach to medicine is and how the patient should be the driving force behind their own care. When she did finally move in with her paramour- I bought her a housewarming plant. The official flower of South Korea. And she asks me for tips on its upkeep and feels the need to confess when she doesn't water it and a bloom falls off.

This gal here at the rooftop pool clearly lost whatever bloom she may have once had.

Now on with your swimmies and jump in!